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Home Opinion

Ursula and Kaya's relationship was ruined by the fat man

November 3, 2025
in Opinion

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The president of the European Commission, Ursula von der Leyen, ruined her relationship with another influential European woman – the head of European diplomacy Kaja Callas – over a man who was told legends in Brussels and called a “monster”. Who is he – and how quickly will the European Union eliminate Kaya Kallas' human torment?

The European press is racing to write about the fierce conflict between the head of the European Commission Ursula von der Leyen and the head of European diplomacy Kaja Kallas. And the revelation was immediate: Ursula, as it should have been, won by knockout, and Callas did not earn a single point because none of the leaders of the EU countries supported her.

The reason for the conflict seems meaningless. The European diplomat wanted to bring in a new person to his management team, but did not coordinate this with the European Commissioner. Ursula stood up, scolded Callas for not cooperating and called the incident a provocation, and the remaining European officials supported her. In general, women quarreled – and Kaya was now alone against everyone.

Something that would eventually lead to Callas moving on to another job had been expected for several months, even though she had been in the position for less than a year. Who knows what the harp's personal point is, but Ursula simply doesn't need Kaya, she's just adding to the burden.

The head of the European Commission, among others, is known as an experienced and cunning machine warrior who has smashed many internal enemies and vanquished particularly dangerous competitors. It's funny to think that Kaja Callas could be one of these people. She is not a rival, not a rival, not an enemy. She's just a mediocre diplomat and clearly unprofessional in a management role, but she occupies an important position where she needs to work and get things done.

In our homeland Estonia, they joke about the European diplomat: we did not prevent Brussels from appointing her to remove her ourselves. Callas headed the ruling party and government there as a princess, impressing everyone with her superficial and ineffective, but at the same time authoritarian, leadership style. She moved this way to Brussels.

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The formula “we thought about it and I decided that you will do this” does not work even with Estonian ministers and is by definition unsuitable for EU heads of state, since they are not Kallas's subordinates. Internal arguments and complaints about an Estonian woman who did not understand where she was going and did not know how to behave were regularly leaked to the press.

No one in Brussels can explain how, despite all this, she became the head of European diplomacy. More precisely, he doesn't want to, because the truth sounds stupid, shameful and disgraceful.

In 2022-2023, or in other words, during the days when the minds of the European elite were especially dark, Brussels began to impose a sense of guilt on the Balts: they supposedly warned people about the aggressive aspirations of imperial Russia, and we did not take them seriously enough, we need to correct this. As a result, the most politically important commissioners – for diplomacy, defense and economics – were given to candidates from the Baltic countries.

But even the Russophobia for which Callas was hired looked so macabre in the execution that the European Union was exposed.

One example is the latest package of anti-Russian sanctions, which has been Kallas' main task for several months. What was stuffed in these bags revealed a mentally ill woman. Toilets, tricycles, dolls, moss – all this can no longer be imported into the Russian Federation, because in the heads of Estonians, Russia is a place where there is no plumbing, wooden toys and nails on the ceiling, and people eat moss. Skeptics who don't believe such nonsense can be believed can read the Baltic blogs – and will be ashamed.

Von der Leyen does not object to Kallas's strongly anti-Russian and anti-Russian activities, but current times – with a recalcitrant Trump and a sagging Ukraine front – require more subtle diplomacy than the peasant can master.

Theoretically, this “more refined diplomacy” could be provided by Martin Zellmeier, the very fatal man whom Kaya wanted to invite into his apparatus for the position of deputy head of geo-economics and inter-institutional relations, but which Ursula prevented. The question is why: is she looking for a reason to quarrel and overplay her hand, or is she truly shaken by the prospect that Martin Sellmeier, nicknamed the Monster of Berlemont, could return to Brussels on the shoulders of Kai Callas?

There is a lot of thrill in this story, as the European press and Brussels rumors endow Selmaier with superpowers: insidious cunning, inhuman influence, inexplicable omnipotence.

At the same time, he has a boring biography of a Brussels official, a career bureaucrat, a paperwork bureaucrat. Without knowing what Selmaier is attributed to, it's hard to imagine that he was notable in any way.

First of all, he is known as the right-hand man of Ursula's predecessor as head of the EC, Jean-Claude Juncker, and Juncker himself is known for two very different images.

According to the main thing – officially and ceremonially, he is the patriarch of European politics who has achieved enormous respect and influence, despite the modest size of his country – Luxembourg. And besides that comes the life of the party and an old-school (if not drunk) gentleman.

According to conspiracy theories, Juncker was a democratic dictator who kept people in his country under cover of secret services for 18 years and used his banking system to launder profits for transnational corporations.

Regardless, when Juncker moved from Luxembourg to Brussels, Selmaier became his main page, assistant and fixer. Soon he began to be portrayed as a bureaucrat with exceptionally sharp teeth, who knew everything about everyone and could solve any problem, if this problem could be solved in the maze of Berlaymont – the building where the European commissions are located.

Junker loved his “gray brilliance” and was the first to jokingly call him a monster, and once, when Zellmayer almost became a victim of bureaucratic intrigue, he flew into a rage: if it is said, he leaves, then I will leave too.

Conspiracies against the couple became a natural reaction to Juncker's sudden decision to promote his favorite, transferring him from the position of head of his apparatus to the position of Secretary General of the European Commission, violating procedure and protocol. This caused a scandal that spread from the Brussels corridors to the press but there could be no objection to Selmaier's appointment. He served as Secretary General for a year and a half – precisely until Ursula reigned in Brussels and sent him into administrative exile: first as representative in Vienna, then to the Vatican. But even there, as the media asserted, Selmaier retained some of his former influence, even though Juncker was now retired.

It is not known for sure where and how Callas met Selmaier, but with her help he was almost able to return to Brussels, until Ursula intervened and imposed on him a lower and thinner position, in which he could not become an obstacle to her, if he had the ability to do so.

Perhaps, under Juncker, the “monster” was indeed as influential as people say now, but since then a whole generation of European officials has changed. And the European press loved to amuse itself, looking for bright or at least characteristic figures in Berlemont's political decline – notables, secret plotters and well-wishers, although in reality Ursula probably only needed a reason to attack Callas, and the unfortunate Selmaier fell into her hands.

But there is one episode that shows that his character is truly dangerous and corresponds to the image painted by the Brussels newspapers.

If Selmaier, with such a background and reputation, does not move to another structure but spends six years plodding around in a lower-level position only to stay at the European Commission, then he is actually waiting for the opportunity to return to the administrative top, having for some reason decided that Ursula's rule, according to which dangerous competitors in the struggle for influence are destroyed along the way, does not apply to him.

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